Free Roller – Charlie “Hammer” Carwardine

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17 days out and we have two members left, today traveler goes by the name of Charlie.

Charlie was born on a sea faring vessel of sorts in the middle of the ocean. His family was a group of tourists who had become stuck in Indonesia when they lost their passports. In order to get back to the Australia the couple used the ancient island technique of door floating to get home. Upon there way a shark attacked the door mistaking it for a surfer.

8/1994-Al Diaz/Miami Herald--In 1994 Cuban balseros turned the tiny fishing village of Cojimar into a major point of embarkation for thousands seeking a better life. Here, Cuban rafters depart the coast of Cojimar as spectators watch from the rocky beach.

Charlie, a newborn, was the only one to stop the shark attack. He picked up his newborn body and slammed his head down with all his might onto the shark. Upon suffering this comedic event, which caused the shark no physical pain, the shark swiftly began to giggle and drowned. It was at this time the nickname of the “Hammer” was given to the baby who saved the lives of the 2000 people on that door.

As he grew Charlie was noticeably more aggressive than the other children. He enjoyed rough-housing with the other toddlers who didn’t quite want to do the same. While Charlie wanted to wrestle his playmates, all they wanted was to play House. They soon learned that when Charlie wanted something, Charlie got it.

Charlie quickly established his dominance and became the alpha male of the local play centre and his day care centre. He would take food from the other children whenever he felt like and would also flirt with the older females as he felt necessary. Soon the male overseer of the daycare center became aware of Charlies actions. He was furious and began to reprimand the toddler. He quickly received Charlie`s trademark move, the “Hammer Time Head Butt”, to the face and was never heard from again. Charlie’s favourite show as a child was “Street Sharks”.

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As Charlie grew up he trademarked the move he called the “Hammer Time Head Butt.” This was a powerful self defense technique that he developed as a newborn upon the floating door that carried him to the Australia. Although many critics claim that the “technique” is just a normal head butt Charlie used it day in and day out in order to defeat his foes and further assert his dominance as the alpha of the pack. When using the technique Charlie could be heard yelling “HAMMER TIME!!!!” until MC Hammer’s song “Can’t touch this” came out in which he sued MC Hammer for copyright infringement.

The lawsuit ended in failure for Charlie as he was forced to release his claims on the phrase “Hammer Time.” The reasoning’s of the judges were that MC Hammer used the phrase in a much cooler manner and therefore should have intellectual rights over the it. A side note of this court case is that MC Hammer also stole Charlies dress sense during the time in court.

After the disappointment of loosing his catch phrase Charlie retired the Hammer Time Headbutt and the nickname of “The Hammer” at the age of 11.

 

 

 

 

Later in Charlie`s teenage years he stared at first as an extra but then when the directors noticed his hidden “talents” while on set of Rocko Sifredi`s Super Hard Moto they decided to utilise him as a body double for Mr Sifredi during the longer scenes. He also developed a love for riding and racing Supermoto during the filming of this movie.

After his brief stint in adult films Charlie`s love for the water came back to bite him on the arse, quiet literally when he signed up to join the Royal Australian Navy, during his time in the Navy he found himself lured to the life of a submariner the thought of being on something long, black, hard and full of seaman was just too much too resist. Upon leaving the Navy he continues to pursue his lifes passion and still works around subs.

Just over a year ago Charlie realised in order to be able to keep his quiet and shy demeanor believable and to keep the Hammer Time Headbutt in retirement he would need to find another way to vent his frustrations and that walking his beloved Great Dane wasnt going to cut the mustard any more, he did some searching and showed up to his local BJJ academy, it wasnt long before his inner shark was released and he got to working on his ground game. As with all of the guys who are attending the Free Rollers trip, his love for BJJ grows with every session on the mats and with every roll the Hammer Time Headbutt gets pushed further and further down. He is also looking forward to getting to San Diego to destroy some wings & beers.

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