Free Roller – Zack Caffery-Kerr

FB_IMG_1502673406699

So as we get nearer to our departure date, I thought why not introduce you to the people your going to meet, hear, see and read about while we are on this epic adventure of Jiu Jitsu and Wings.

First up we have Zack Caffery-Kerr a Purple belt from Perth Western Australia. When asked to describe himself he ever so modestly used the words, Strong, Agile, Big Dick and a Full time savage. Three out of the 4 are spot on but his strength could use some work.

Zack is a dynamic figure, often seen scaling Perths High Rise buildings with his bare hands. He designed all of Perths train stations on a lunch breaks, with nothing more then a lead pencil and a brown paper bag and yet made them more efficient then some of the biggest railway systems in the world. He writes deep self discovery blog posts (You can find them HERE).  Occasionally, for extra cardio he will tread water for three days in a row….. Naked.

Zack woos men and women with sensuous and godlike (rusty) trombone playing, He rides bicycles up severe inclines with unfaltering speed, and has the uncanny ability to cook Two Minute Noodles in thirty seconds. He is an expert in pottery, a veteran in love, and an outlaw in many countries.

Using only a pick axe and a large glass of water, he once defended a small village in the Amazon Basin from a horde of ferocious army ants, this is also where he began his journey into the arts of BJJ. He plays bluegrass cello, was scouted by the LA Dodgers and has has been the subject of numerous documentaries. When Zack is bored, he builds large suspension bridges in his backyard. He enjoys urban hang gliding and death defying parkour. On Wednesdays, after work, he teaches Mongolian language to the local children.

Critics worldwide swoon over his original line of corduroy evening wear. He has yet to be seen perspiring. Being a somewhat private citizen, he still receives kilos of  fan mail each week. He has an uncanny ability to always be the right caller on AM radio competition lines. His deft floral arrangements have earned him fame in international botany circles.

Zack can hurl dumbbells at small moving objects with deadly accuracy. He once read Paradise Lost, Moby Dick, and Mein Kampf in one day and still had time to renovate his entire house that evening. He knows the exact location of every food item in every supermarket, a talent that will come in handy when looking for the chicken wings in San Diego. He has been known to sleep only once a week; when he does sleep, he does so standing up. While on a recent vacation in Iraq, he successfully single-handedly reclaimed the town of Mosul. The laws of physics do not apply to Zack, just try to ankle lock him.

He balances, He weaves, He dodges, He frolics, and his bills are all paid and he doesnt do meth. On weekends, to let off steam, he participates in full-contact origami. Years ago he discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. He has made award winning four course meals using only a pasta strainer and a toaster oven. He also breeds prizewinning clams. Zack has won bullfights in San Juan, cliff-diving competitions in Sri Lanka, and spelling bees at the Kremlin. He has played Hamlet, He has performed open-heart surgery, and once spoke with Tupac.

And now for his next adventure he travels to San Diego to train Jiu Jitsu with an equally impressive bunch of guys! Stay tuned to hear about them.

Share this post

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *